“Or else the torture room.” BSC Mystery #36: Kristy and the Cat Burglar (1998)

I’ve been a little distracted in posting for the past few weeks. Between wedding plans and having all three of my bridesmaids pregnant at the same time, I’ve been in a tizzy. Well, now only two of my bridesmaids are pregnant, as my baby sister gave birth to her beautiful, 9lb 10oz ‘big nugget’ this morning. I was planning to call the baby Munchkin if I referred to her on the blog—the way I call my ‘nieces’ Pepper and Kakies, but at that size, she’s not really a munchkin. Nugget is sticking! (Her real name, which I will not post for her privacy, is Shakespearean and absolutely lovely.)

Kristy, David Michael and Karen are wandering around to look at the ‘spooky house’ that is in the woods near their house. While they’re there, a shot rings out and the burglar alarm goes off. Officer Johnson got an anonymous call suggesting he check out the house at the same time the security officer got a call saying his wife was in the hospital. A bag of jewels was stolen, and a red cat was painted on the mail box, the MO of a thief known as The Cat Burglar.

The police officers make Sgt. Johnson their primary suspect. He claims it’s a setup, but he’s arrested anyway. Cary, who witnessed the crime as well, helps the BSC solve the crime. Cary joins Kristy, Mary Anne and Abby at the house, where the owner—who had employed the BSC to solve the crime—has a very rare lamp that had been stolen at an earlier Cat Burglar job. They’d just laid out all the evidence that Sgt. Johnson was innocent, right as Cary and Kristy realize he was the one who’d planted all the evidence. He is about to tie them up when the police arrive. The Cat Burglar is arrested, Sgt. Johnson was exonerated and the BSC vows not to solve mysteries again.

Meanwhile, apparently they hadn’t had a Harriet the Spy takeoff in quite a while, so Charlotte is going around spying on her friends…who get tired of being spied on, so they start spying on her.

Interesting Tidbits

The cover: Apparently, the newspaper article is shocking! Also, Kristy looks different than normal. The art isn’t done by Hodges Solieu or however that’s spelled. Oh, and Kristy’s neon green shorts are hawt!

Kristy runs into Cary, and says that the woods behind her house also abut Cary’s house. I have a few comments about that. Abby lives two houses down from Kristy, next to Morbidda Destiny, and there’s another yard backing up to her backyard—one small enough that she can see into his house through binoculars. And the map in the Complete Guide places Cary’s house on Burnt Hill Road, nowhere near Kristy’s house. Now, to be fair, if you continue down McLelland (Kristy’s street), it ends at Hazlet. Take that far enough and you hit Burnt Hill right at/near Cary’s house. Both Kristy’s house and Cary’s are on the far western side of this map, so it’s possible there are woods there. Maybe the road that our friend the embezzler’s house is on runs at an angle, so that Abby can see into Mr. Finch’s yard, but then woods become thicker and thicker so that Cary’s yard hits some real forest.

Wow, I put waaaaaaaay too much thought into that.

The BSC members are introduced by the best mystery they helped solve. I haven’t finished the chapter yet, but it should be funny when they get to Mal and Jessi, who both got pretty shitty mysteries for their only mystery book.

Um. Sgt. Johnson has some questions for Kristy about what she saw as she, Karen and DM approached Reinhart Golem’s house. (That name is flippin’ awesome, by the way). However, when he asks her to meet him at the police department, he says he’s not really questioning her, because that would require a parent. Instead, it’s just a consultation. This rubs in all the wrong ways. I know we’re supposed to consider Sgt. Johnson a suspect, but this is soooo wrong that I just want them to lock him up, separate from whether he’s The Cat Burglar or not. (Especially because he brings Cary in with his father.)

Oh, and then Kristy starts asking him questions about the burglary, and he answers them! Sure, he doesn’t suspect that Kristy—with two seven year old kids in tow—is The Cat Burglar, but you never know. Someone could have sent her as a distraction.

I like the fact that emphasis is placed on the fact that Claudia, MA, Kristy and Cary are all wearing bike helmets. That definitely wasn’t the case in the early books.

The title quote is what MA says right after Claudia finds the gym in Reinhart Golem’s house. I’m completely with Mary Anne on this one.

Wow, SPD really sucks. It takes Kristy and Cary to find a bullet casing and MA to find a bullet hole in the door and the marker used to put The Cat Burglar’s calling card on the mail box. Shouldn’t the coppers have found the casing when they secured the crime scene?

Kristy tells Golem the BSC had solved a lot of mysteries, including catching jewel thieves. They didn’t actually catch any jewel thieves. Not only were the thieves in mystery #8 actually actors, but that mystery didn’t involve any BSC member except Jessi. And the ‘jewel thief’ in mystery #1 was a cat. I can’t think of another mystery where any jewels were stolen or waylaid, except this one.

I liked this, too: Mallory researched The Cat Burglar and refers to him as a he. Jessi questions her sexist notion by suggesting that the burglar could also be female.

Unfortunately, that tiny victory is followed by a whole slew of cat jokes. Blechh.

The BSC’s list of suspects: Sgt. Johnson, because the police suspect him and he knows a lot about alarm systems; Ben Birch, Golem’s former partner; Jack Fenton, the security guard who responded to the house alarm; and Cary, because he was there at the time of the break in and knows a lot about guns.

Golem suggests that Sgt. Johnson’s fingerprints ‘may be’ all over the marker Mary Anne found at the crime scene. What? Kristy noted when the other two officers investigating the case, Sgt. Winters and Officer Hopkins, took the evidence from Golem, they probably wouldn’t be able to fingerprint it, because Golem put his hands all over it as he handed it over.

OOH! Time for the BSC to split up and take notes. What does that mean for us? You got it—Claudia’s spelling! Infourmation, heres’, weerd, culdn’t, anywhare, articals, buisness. This is followed by a babysitting notebook entry by Claudia, so…hearby, announse, officialy, nieghbors, wont.

Stacey convinces Cary that she’s really into bird watching, as an excuse to get into his house and learn a little bit more about him. Raise your hand if you think Cary actually fell for her line. He did invite Stacey in and show her his bird watching notebooks, though.

Jessi checked for information on Ben Birch on the internet, and all I could think is, if I had an eleven year old daughter, I wouldn’t want her on the internet without supervision.

More Claudia spelling! Tusday, dont. She also uses there for their.

Here’s a good clue and the BSC doesn’t even make a real connection. Years ago, Sgt. Johnson investigated Golem for smuggling, but the case was closed because there was no cause. The BSC thinks that Johnson may have held a grudge over that and therefore, robbed him. Huh?

The Thomas-Brewer clan has call waiting, yet Claudia’s phone doesn’t even have speaker capabilities. (Remember when Jessi had to have the operator break into Kristy’s conversation with Bart to tell her that Dawn and Claudia had been found alive?!? Those were the days!)

Mary Anne’s upset that the BSC suspects Sgt. Johnson. Claudia tries to soothe her…by making her eat a Butterfinger. Later, Kristy rewards Mal’s sleuthing the same way.

Sgt. Johnson shows up at the Kishi house to talk to Kristy, Claudia and MA, all the girls who’d been caught snooping at Golem’s house. Janine’s the one who answers the door, and she’s so curious that Kristy can feel it radiating off of her. I have been seeking the answer to a real-life mystery here for about a week, so I really feel her pain. I’m way more interested in whether Claudia tells her what’s going on later than I am in the solution to this mystery.

Also, does Sgt. Johnson know it’s BSC meeting time? If so, why did he take the time to learn that?!?

Oh, and then he goes and tells them he’s being suspected of the robbery, but he’s the victim of a frame up. Umm…doesn’t SPD have an internal affairs department that should be investigating stuff like that, not a bunch of thirteen and eleven year olds? And if they don’t believe him, I’d head straight to the sheriff’s office or the state police or something. Those are really serious accusations and not something that he should be throwing around lightly…especially not to the BSC, who can’t legally do anything to help him. (If I remember the rest of the book correctly, he’s actually right, but that’s beside the point…)

The only amusing part of the Charlotte-as-a-spy story (other than when Charlotte caught one of the triplets picking his nose? because you have to remember, I’m secretly a ten year old boy) is when Abby decides the only way to keep an eye on Charlotte and her friends while they’re doing their spy work is to spy on them.

I love this exchange between Kristy and Sam. You guys know how I enjoy it when the siblings in this book like each other but also antagonize one another.

Kristy: Leave me alone, I’m trying to think.

Sam: Aww, don’t do that. You might strain your brain.

Kristy drags Cary to the BSC meeting to tell the club what he saw during the robbery. He completely freaks out about going to the meeting. I really can’t believe that Cary would freak out about it…the BSC, yes, but not Cary. Remember how weirded out they were when Logan first started coming to meetings? But very little seems to ruffle Cary.

Golem is a giant rich-guy stereotype. He comes to the door in a blue velvet smoking jacket with satin lapels, matching slippers, holding a brandy and a cigar. I kept waiting for him to swirl his brandy.

The final two pieces to the puzzle? Cary recognizes a lamp from a Cat Burglar burglary in Golem’s house, and Golem realizes the BSC knows the evidence against Johnson was planted. Just as Golem starts to lock them in, Cary attacks him and earns them just enough time for Abby and Mary Anne to escape. But the real winner in this case is Jessi, who happens to paw through the reservation log and see that Golem was in Chez Maurice on the day of the burglary, when he claimed he was still in France, so the BSC members who weren’t at Golem’s called the police.

So that’s the last BSC mystery. I am I sad about that? A little. But mostly only because there seems to be less Cary Retlin in the books when there aren’t mysteries to solve.

Outfits

Stacey: khakis, white button down, brown boots

Charlotte: jeans, red sweatshirt, red sneakers

Claudia: purple painters pants, red high tops with purple laces, red sweatshirt with purple embroidery, purple glasses frames with no lenses

Next: #124

“You guys wouldn’t mind if I did a little embezzling, would you?” BSC Mystery# 35: Abby and the Notorious Neighbor (1998) AND BSC Little Sister #111: Karen’s Spy Mystery (1999)

Oh, holy hell. I haven’t read this Abby book, but I have seen it summarized and nitpicked on a couple other blogs. So while I was picking up Little Sister books for my niece a year or so ago, I found this Karen book. And realized, “Hey, wait a minute…isn’t this the exact same plot, only simplified for younger readers?” And it so is. Heck, look at the covers:

Different angles, but almost exactly the same. Karen’s obviously taking notes, while Abby, being Abby…has a box of tissues so she can blow her nose. Oh, and Abby has Anna hair, but that’s another story.

Let’s start the book summary by saying how jealous I am of Abby. I watched America’s Most Wanted for years, wanting to recognize and catch a criminal. Abby’s home with bronchitis, and while watching hours of television, catches a show with wanted fugitives. Later, when she gets super bored, she starts spying on all the neighbors and realizes that one of her neighbors, Mr. Finch, looks exactly like an embezzler she saw on the show. She and Kristy begin spying on him, looking at his mail, and peeking in his windows. They get some proof that he’s actually the embezzler by digging in his trash.

Meanwhile, all the kids are building go-karts for a soap box derby. There’s a few little dramas, like the triplets not wanting to let Nicky be on their team, and a girls team (Vanessa, Charlotte and Becca) and a boys team (the Rodowskys) copying each other. At the last second, the race is won by a ‘secret’ team that Abby learns about by spying.

Interesting Tidbits

Before I get to the books—I will comment on the Karen Krap at the end of this blog entry—let’s talk about Karen’s glasses for a moment. Or rather, the one time in my life I made a Karen-related comment that wasn’t mean, and nobody was around to appreciate it. I was once glasses shopping and, as usual, hated every pair of frames. I finally found a pair I didn’t hate, and considered getting two pairs of that frame. As I was making up my mind, I realized that they had the same pair, in another shade. I ended up with two pairs of glasses, same frames, two different colors. I said, “Just like Karen Brewer! She’s my role model, after all.” And of course, no one got the joke. Maybe that’s why I’ve never bought matching frames like that again….

We first meet Mr. Finch when he’s mowing his lawn. At eight o’clock. On Monday morning. Mrs. Stevenson decides she should go talk to him, because that’s just too early. Two comments to this: a) Someone in Kristy and Abby’s neighborhood actually mows their own lawn?!? b) They should meet my old high school teacher. He lived in the school district, and his neighbors reported that he would mow his lawn at six am on a Saturday.

The title quote is from chapter two. (See, sometimes it pays to read chapter two.) Stacey says there’s enough money in the club treasury for a leather jacket she’s been eyeing. This is even funnier, given the comments about Stacey’s dad in last week’s entry.

As Abby is flipping channels while home sick, she watches a snippet of soap opera: “Oh Jose, I never knew love could be like this—or perhaps I did, before I was kidnapped and developed amnesia…” That’s kinda funny. My favorite moments on soaps have always been the ones where a) they insert random comedy and b) they acknowledge the absurdity of their situation. For the former, there was a scene between a father and son (Luke and Lucky, General Hospital) who are doing the bachelor thing. Lucky doesn’t have a napkin, so he says he’ll wipe his hands on his shirt. (He’s about thirteen.) Luke tells him to wipe his hands on the dog instead. For the latter, there was a wedding on As the World Turns years ago. A woman was sitting in the pews and muttered, “I’m the sister of the groom and the mother of the bride.” And she was completely accurate, yet no laws had been broken! Ahh, soaps.

Abby calls her mother Ma at one point. That actually sounds pretty New England. My dad called his mother Ma, and so do a lot of my cousins in Rhode Island.

Apparently, three different buses drop off elementary school kids in Abby’s neighborhood. And they conveniently all arrive at the same time…. Abby already has binoculars out, for some innocent bird watching, so she starts watching the kids instead. She doesn’t want to call it spying, but that’s just semantics. Even if she calls it looking or watching, it’s still spying. I mean, she’s observed the fact that Scott Hsu’s underwear is sticking out of his pants, for crying out loud. If that’s not snooping, I don’t know what is.

Heh. When Mal and Stacey are supervising two teams of go-kart builders, the girls—Vanessa, Charlotte, and Becca—stop for a candy break. Becca squeals and Mallory’s first response is…to ask if she needs the Heimlich maneuver. Abby says the BSC all know how to respond to choking. But if that’s true, shouldn’t they know you never do the Heimlich on anyone who can make noises, like Becca was doing? I think the funniest part about that is that, to me, that was more of a Mary Anne, worry-wart type of response.

The BSC doesn’t believe that Abby actually spotted a wanted criminal, but Kristy is especially dubious. Later, Abby is ‘watching’ Mr. Finch again, and becomes convinced she was right about him. She calls Kristy, who is so ridiculously sarcastic about the whole thing (and I can’t blame her). She suggests Abby saw him holding a machine gun, and then after finding out he was just eating dinner, says, “Oh my lord! How suspicious can you get?”

Abby calls the Mystery Trackers hotline to ask some questions about the two men she saw, trying to sort out details she was only half watching in a feverish haze. She talks to a summer intern, who is completely clueless and says something like, “Oh, cool, you spotted one of our criminals? Should I call the authorities?” I never called America’s Most Wanted, but I imagine that they have a script they would have to follow, and it never includes saying how cool the information is.

Ooh, Mary Anne goes to talk to Sgt. Johnson. He gives her a ‘Look’ when he suggests that there’s no harm in checking into Mr. Finch as long as he doesn’t know about it. Not only does that sound so wrong—like he’s giving the BSC permission to spy—but I totally read that Look as a sexy Look rather than a ‘don’t go spying’ Look. Now we know why Sgt. Johnson takes the BSC so seriously: it’s not because they’re good detectives, but he and Mary Anne have a little thing on the side. (Later, Abby says that he’s good looking.)

Claudia and Stacey do some cyber-sleuthing for information about Mr. Finch and the two criminals he might be. Janine helps them use the computer. Not only is it so far too modern for the BSC, but it’s also hilarious now. First, there’s the squeal of dial-up. And then when they search the criminals, they decide to print out some pictures of them to compare to Mr. Finch. And only ten minutes later, they have their pictures! It’s so technological!

Abby finally convinces Kristy she’s right about Mr. Finch, and they discuss the fact that Arthur Maguire—the embezzler they think is Finch—abandoned his kids, who were ‘about six and eight.’ Kristy says that all six year olds draw houses with smoke coming out of the chimneys, and all eight year old girls draw horses, while all eight year old boys draw rocket ships. First off…the hell? Really? That is the most ridiculous generalization ever. Let’s assume for a second that it might be true. Even if all eight year old boys do draw rocket ships, they probably also draw aliens, robots, cartoon characters, and all kinds of other objects. We all know, of course, that not all six year olds draw houses. I’ve never drawn a horse in my life, for example. At age eight, I was more into ‘fashion’ design.

I love that they actually built a ‘don’t try this at home’ into the plot, right before Abby and Kristy do something stupid. I have no idea what, as I haven’t read it yet. But the BSC are always doing things in these mysteries that are supremely bad ideas. When they’re not chasing counterfeiters down the street, they’re chasing dogs into suspect’s houses…

Kristy goes and peeks in Mr. Finch’s window, looking for proof that he really is Arthur Maguire, and almost gets caught. First Kristy called and made up a story to get him out of the house. I misread the part when he comes back, and thought he’d used *69 to call back whoever had pranked him. Instead, Abby actually hit redial to force him into the house, and it worked!

Claudia spelling! There was actually a brief moment of it earlier in the book, when she wrote serfing and awsome. This time, we get waching and curiose. She also uses sped for speed, there for their and herd for heard.

Okay. Now that we’ve learned all there is to learn about Abby spying, let’s talk about Karen. In Karen’s Spy Mystery, the Dawes family, who live across the street, go on a business trip to Seattle. A family friend, Bill Barnett, is going to be housesitting, and Karen is supposed to give the family kitten eye drops in the middle of the day and watch the house while Bill is at work. Karen starts spying on the house because she doesn’t like Bill. (He finds her annoying and slams the door in her face, and that’s all it takes for her.) She sees some mildly suspicious behavior and jumps to the conclusion that Bill is trying to rob the Daweses. Hannie tries to talk her out of it, but Karen follows him around and even puts a tape recorder in the Dawes house to try to catch him doing something bad. She records him admitting that he stole money from Nancy’s father’s bank, and the police take him away.

Let’s compare here. Each story features a young female who becomes convinced that a neighbor is doing something illegal. They both have a friend they can’t convince of that fact, until they do some serious spying and get a small amount of evidence. The two friends then do something unethical and probably illegal to get enough proof for the police. Not only do the police accept the tip solely on the basis of hunch and illegal evidence, but each girl gets reward money for her bad behavior.

So what did we—and the preteen girls who read these books—learn? Always trust your instincts when it comes to your neighbors? I think the message is more like “Spy on your neighbors and you will reap in moola.” I’m suddenly glad we didn’t own a pair of binoculars when I was a kid, and that the houses in my neighborhood were far enough apart to not be able to look in windows.

Next: #120

“Am I getting old, or is very noisy in here?” BSC Mystery #34: Mary Anne and the Haunted Bookstore (1998)

I want to point out, before I begin, that this is the most Scooby-esque title of them all in the BSC mysteries series. Maybe if they’d kept going, there could have been a “[Insert your favorite babysitter] and the Mystery of the Abandoned Amusement Park”, where in there’s a monster. Stacey rips the monster’s mask off and discovers it’s really the groundskeeper, and then Shannon the dog and Logan have some Scooby snacks and eat everything in the kitchen at the Spier-Schafer house. Possible, but let’s move on.

A new, mystery-themed bookstore is opening in town. It’s called Poe and Company, and the building it’s housed in had a Poe connection: allegedly, the original owner of the house, Benson Dalton Gable, either was an admirer of Poe’s, or Poe stole his best work from Gable (depending on whom you believe.) There’s even a rumor that Poe killed Gable. Weird, Poe-related things keep happening in the house, and the BSC moves to figure out who’s behind them. It turns out that the owner, Mr. Cates, and his assistant, Ms. Sparks, did everything as a publicity stunt. Then the BSC and the kids discover hidden compartments in a desk and reveal the true relationship between Gable and Poe.

In the B-plot, Mr. Cates uprooted his two children to open the bookstore. His wife recently left the family, and no real reason is ever given for why. However, Kristy helps his two kids realize that it’s not their fault and that they shouldn’t be angry with their father or his potential new girlfriend, either. Then the BSC helps them feel like they fit in.

C-plot: another ridiculous festival.

Interesting tidbits

Heehee, Mary Anne’s wearing a tank top! Oh, and that’s clearly a wig, see?

The story starts with a pretty detailed retelling of Poe’s “The Tell-tale Heart,” which MA is reading for English class. (I never liked Poe’s scary stories, and would never read them voluntarily myself.)

Sharon-itis: work papers in the fridge

Okay, so the whole plot of this book revolves around a niche bookstore, right? This was 1998, so maybe it was before online shopping started killing even large box stores. But why create a bookstore that focuses exclusively on mysteries? It cuts down your choices of titles, and it cuts down your customer base. I like some select mysteries, but I wouldn’t set foot in a store like that.

Since I haven’t done this in a while: when the triplets are first mentioned in this book, it’s done alphabetically.

You know it’s been raining a lot in Stoneybrook when all the BSC members are tired of rain jokes and puns…even Abby.

“Here’s the office where the old guy wrote stuff.” You can tell Tom Cates really loves living in a historic building and hearing about it all day long.

Mr. Cates and his coworker/possible girlfriend, Cillia Sparks, keep making Poe jokes all the time. It makes me want to retch.

Haven’t even gotten to the mystery yet, but here are the suspects so far: Ms. Sparks, a big Poe fanatic who is helping Mr. Cates open the store; Alex Gable, descendent of Benson Dalton Gable, and his father; a construction worker who seems to do more eavesdropping than working*; Ramona Kingsolver, a professor from Stoneybrook University; and Mr. Cates himself. Kingsolver expresses that she believes Gable admired and respected Poe and initiated a relationship with him. Alex, on the other hand, believes that his ancestor was a superior, more popular writer, and Poe stole ideas from him.

*At this point, MA is supposed to be painting, but she’s doing more eavesdropping than painting. She really shouldn’t judge anyone.

You know it’s important that Ramona Kingsolver is superstitious, because she’s completely nuts-believes-every-ridiculous-story kind of superstitious. She freaks when Alex walks under a ladder, goes ballistic when he opens his umbrella in the house, hates Pluto the cat simply because black cats are unlucky, and wears a rabbit’s foot and four-leaf clover.

Some real (non-Poe) books mentioned for the bookstore: The Westing Game and From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler. Both of those are actually awesome books. (The former was the first mystery I actually loved and, at least partly, solved prior to the big reveal at the end.)

Mr. Cates and Ms. Sparks leave the house, but need someone to stay behind and accept a delivery. MA and Logan volunteer. Maybe Mr. Cates doesn’t know they’re dating, but to me, leaving two teens, one of each gender, alone in your house—especially teens that aren’t related to you and you aren’t legally responsible for—sounds like a horrific idea. (Interestingly, when Mr. Cates comes back with his kids, Gillian says bye to MA and MA’s boyfriend. Claudia told her who Logan is. Mr. Cates still seems unconcerned. I guess coming home and finding them still clothed probably helped.)

Caludia speling! Do’nt, annother, Saterday, was’nt, teling, wurest (worst), everybudy, werld, geting. Also, she uses there for they’re, wurst for worst and hole for whole. She also spells Gillian as Jilian, but a) she’s never met her before and b) Jillian is more common than Gillian, so I’ll give her a pass.

Claudia and Stacey take the Cates kids and Charlotte to see Star Wars. Tom says everyone’s seen that movie before. I’m pretty sure all three Star Wars movies replayed that year or there abouts, leading up to the release of The Phantom Menace. That was actually the first time I’d ever seen Star Wars. So, shut up, Tom.

Mrs. Pike says the title line at Pizza Express, right after she gives the triplets money to play video games. Look, lady. You’re the dingbat who took five of your kids out for pizza…right after a very crowded movie…on a day when it’s too wet to play outside. Take some aspirin and get over it.

This is pretty funny, though. When Claudia loses Tom in the bathroom at the movie theater, she runs into Alan. She asks him if a boy named Tom is in the restroom, and Alan says he’s alone. He then laughingly suggests that Claudia lost her date, even as Claud explains that she’s babysitting. Later, he runs into Claudia sitting at the table and asks if her new boyfriend ever came back.

Vanessa even writes a poem about her pizza. I fear for the Pikes when she’s old enough to discover Poe and his ilk.

Ha ha! Alex meets Stacey and starts flirting with her. He says he thought she went to SHS with him, but Stacey confirms she’s in middle school. All I could think was that he must not be that cute, or Stacey would have pretended to be older (like she did in the BSC movie.)

So apparently, since Gable’s grave has never been found (WTF? How do you lose a grave?), Alex believes that Poe killed Gable and walled him up in his own house, and then stole his ‘missing documents.’ (For those not up on Poe, he references “The Tell-tale Heart” and “The Cask of Amontillado,” both of which involve burying someone in a house.) Someone is behind the wall, but it’s the cat, just like Poe’s “The Black Cat.”

Alex claims that the Gable house was the inspiration for Poe’s “The Raven” because there are ravens carved in to the fireplace (or something lame like that). Then MA finds words from the poem carved into a shelf in Gable’s bookcase. Ooh, and then Mr. Cates drops a paper that is signed Annabel Lee, like the Poe poem, and tells MA not to tell anyone else. It’s all so mysterious! (You should hear my sarcastic happiness in that statement.)

Mistake! In Kristy’s notebook entry, she writes ‘Aunt Cecilia.’ Jessi’s aunt’s name is spelled Cecelia. Prior to these books, every one I’d ever known with that name spelt it Cecilia, which is the original spelling. (It’s the feminine of Cecil). However, I’ve since met a real-life Cecelia, and I’m assuming her parents chose that spelling for the nickname Celia, which is indeed how she’s known.

Maybe we were weird little kids, but when we used to play hide and seek, there was no base or home. You stayed hidden until you were found; you didn’t try to escape from your hiding place and race around the house. Anyone else play like that?

Tom has a theory, which is probably at least partly true: he thinks his parents only got married because his dad is obsessed with Poe, and his mother’s name is Annabel Lee. That’s probably what got his attention about her in the first place, but hopefully not what caused him to propose or anything

I keep trying to type Pow instead of Poe. Honestly, this story would be a lot more awesome if Mr. Cates and the rest of the characters were all obsessed with the Pikes’ dog.

Ms. Spark keeps calling Mary Anne Dupin, which I assume is a Poe reference I can’t immediately place. Logan and Claudia suggest calling in the Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew to help solve the mystery, but Ms. Sparks says the BSC is better. (A reporter came to interview Mr. Cates about the bookstore, and the random reporter actually recognizes MA from earlier mysteries.)

After someone lets a raven into the building, MA decides to check everyone’s shoes to see who was outside (and would therefore have muddy shoes, since it had been raining for weeks straight). You’d think EVERYONE in the building would have muddy shoes at this point. This doesn’t seem like the best way to make a determination of guilt. So much for MA being Dupin…

I love when AMM and her ghostwriters throw little tidbits about not trusting media coverage. This time, it stems from something Poe wrote (from Dupin’s point of view), but relates directly to the newspaper article posted about the bookstore.

Ha! Remember the reference to The Westing Game earlier in the book? MA goes to a pet store and finds out they ordered a raven for a woman, whom the clerk couldn’t describe. MA says she found a raven—which she sort of did—and gives the clerk her name. Only she writes Marie Roget, a character in one of the Dupin mysteries. It reminded me of a plot point in another of Ellen Raskin’s books, The Tattooed Potato and Other Clues. The main character, who has the improbable name of Dickory Dock, claims she’s a famous poet to hide her identity, only to have that be more disastrous than if she’d just given her own name.

The BSC continues to believe there’s actually a ghost until they find definitive proof that someone’s been creating these situations as a hoax of some kind. (They find the Cates’ missing stereo in the basement, with a ‘beating heart’ tape still in it, explaining the sounds MA and Logan heard while alone in the house.) I love how these teenaged girls, very much old enough to know better, keep believing in ghosts over and over again, despite Dawn and her ghost stories leaving town.

You know the BSC is getting desperate when they start borrowing detective tools from the triplets…

Claudia spelling, part two: furst, pikture, mach (match), difrent, smal, difrences, desine. She also uses its for it’s and to for too.

My only comment on the ‘sunny day festival’? I can’t believe that Stacey would voluntarily make a mud pie, but it’s actually all her idea.

In the end, Mary Anne, with Gillian’s help, finds a hidden compartment in Gable’s desk. Inside is a lap desk, full of the letters between Gable and Poe. There are a lot of unanswered questions though: whatever happened to Gable’s body? What did MA do for her Poe English project? And what kind of name is Cillia, anyway?

Oh, and the last page of the book—before the preview for mystery #35—notes that Benson Dalton Gable was not real and didn’t exist, but Poe did. Well, duh.

I also just realized that MA has #34 and M#34. I wonder if that happens any other time? I can't think of one, but I'm also not trying to hard either. :P

New characters

Tom and Gillian Cates (10 and 7)—28 and 25

Outfits

Mary Anne: yellow slicker with navy lining

Claudia: jeans painted with raindrops on the legs, long white shirt, gray vest painted with umbrellas, parasol earrings

Stacey: navy rain hat, navy miniskirt, white ribbed turtleneck, white ribbed stockings, navy nail polish; turquoise sundress, white sunglasses with turquoise polka dots, denim jacket

Jessi: t-shirt with shiny gold sun

Next: #119. Can’t wait! (There goes that sarcasm again.)

“Mary Anne had never imagined herself hanging around outside the boys’ bathroom.” BSC Mystery #33: Stacey and the Stolen Hearts (1998)

I actually kind of like this mystery. Why? Because it’s something that could actually happen. As opposed to when Stacey actually helped the Secret Service catch a counterfeiter (M#10) or appeared in the world’s worst horror movie (M#24).

Pete and Stacey create a Valentine-Gram fundraiser, which is a pretty standard school fundraiser. The problem? The bag of valentines goes missing, and then someone starts posting facts gleaned from the bag to embarrass various students. The BSC suspects Cary, naturally, along with a variety of random students. It turns out that Cary didn’t steal the bag, but he did post all the notes around school. The culprit was actually Alan, who’d asked to get a valentine back and had been refused. He returns the bag and the valentines are (almost) all delivered.

The B-plot is so stupid, I almost didn’t write about it. The BSC throws a ‘festival’ for V-Day for the kids, because the kids are all bummed out about the holiday. It has snacks and crafts and everyone’s required to make a valentine for every other person who goes to the festival. In other words, it’s exactly like nearly every elementary classroom’s party. It’s pretty par for the course these days that, in elementary school, valentines are required for every member of the class, there are heart shaped cookies and crafts, and romance is pretty much not allowed.

Interesting Tidbits

Not only is Stacey appropriately V-Day garbed, she’s overly horrified by the hearts all over the lockers. I tried to read them, but all I can discern is a few capital letters. Very disappointing.

YAY! Stacey finally cut off her perm. For someone so (allegedly) stylish, she’s at least five years behind the times, there.

Apparently Ethan scores a gazillion on the hunk-o-meter. Very mature, Stacey. She describes him and I’m totally picturing him as a borderline-Emo artist.

We meet the BSC by what kind of Valentine they send. I swear, some of these intros are so cheesy, they have to stretch quite a bit to make them work.

Heh. When Kristy makes fun of Stacey’s fish sticks, suggesting they look like gopher nuts, Stacey shoots back that it’s actually monkey snot. Not only does this gross Kristy out, but all I could imagine when Kristy said gopher nuts was gopher testicles…Now I’m grossed out.

Should I transcribe all the Valentine-Grams? Sure, why not. This first one is to Claudia from ‘an admirer’ (aka Josh): Sometimes roses are white/And sometimes violets are too/I’ve been as high as a kite/ever since I kissed you. BLECKK!

The first note that’s plastered all over school? Cokie sent her latest boyfriend 12 valentines, and he sent her none in return. It also says that Cokie called him Sugarbear.

Cary has an alibi for the time of the theft—he was at the dentist. He even offers to provide Stacey a sworn affidavit from the hygienist. Everyone say it with me: I love Cary Retlin.

The second note is similar to the first, only it’s addressed to Jacqui, the ‘bad’ girl Stacey used to hang out with, who has a big thing for Robert and sent him several valentines.

Abby takes Logan’s joke, and when Kristy calls the meeting to order, she asks for a BLT. I rolled my eyes, but Kristy’s response was pretty good: “That joke is so old. Last time I heard it, I fell off my dinosaur.”

Suspects: Brian and Rose Marie, this couple who got together through Claudia’s matchmaking service in #71 (I had totally forgotten about them); Alan; Pete; Robert; Cary; Cokie. The only way to narrow the list down? You got it. The BSC divided it up and played spy/detective.

Claudia spelling: franckly, dissapointed, brot, gess. She also uses there for their, ferry for fairy. And she spells Brian as Brain. (This makes me laugh. I have a cousin named Brian, and my one uncle went to Disney for his honeymoon. He brought back mouse hats for all the nieces and nephews with our names on them, but Brian’s said Brain.)

The title quote comes from Mary Anne’s stakeout of Pete. Mal and Jessi also do the same thing of lurking around the potty, but Jessi calls it Lavatory Listening. (The book says the two of them were hiding in a stall. Were they sharing a stall? That’s going to get noticed. Now I’m picturing an episode of Degrassi the Next Generation in which three boys were reading the directions to a penis pump while sharing a bathroom stall…)

Valentine thief strikes for a third time, plastering the halls with valentines exchanged between Rose Marie and King.

Oh boy, a Logan notebook entry! It’s not actually that interesting, except that he tells Kristy she’s right, and Stacey thinks Logan is pretty much now Kristy’s new best friend because of that.

Stacey explains what a focus group is, which is boring. However, the items she makes up to describe focus groups are pretty awesome: Maxi-Clean for Small Dogs, Spring-Fresh Mitten Deodorizer, and, my personal favorite, Chocolate Covered Fish Zingies (which apparently snowboarders think are ‘totally awesome.’)

Becca, about Valentine’s Day: “I like to send cards to my friends, but that doesn’t mean I want to marry them.” No, of course not, Becca. You’re in third grade. When you start pulling their hair and calling them Puke Face, then you want to marry them.

Valentine-gram from Jim Poirier (who?) to our favorite, Sabrina Bouvier: Dear Sabrina, I knew from the moment I saw your beautiful eyes and perfect nose that you were something special. Will you go out with me?

The Scooby-gang gets their first and only clue, which breaks the case open: when Cary copies the Jim-to-Sabrina VG, part of his hand and stripy sleeve appear on the paper. This is not up to his usual standard of sneakiness. (Earlier in that same chapter, Stacey tries to sneak information about his dentist out of him. He figures it out and gives her his dentist’s name and tells her to look him up under ‘alibi.’ Of course, because HIPPAA or however it’s spelled does not exist in the BSC-universe, the dentist’s receptionist gladly verifies that Cary was indeed there during the crime.)

While trying to figure out who’s wearing stripes, the characters check the cafeteria: “It was strange to be looking only at people’s clothes and not their faces.” Of course. You can’t fully judge someone unless you check their hair and makeup in addition to their fashion.

“The BSC version of the SWAT team.” BSCSWAT…if it were a TV show, I’d watch it.

Claudia is actually the one who makes the Cary connection: not only is he wearing stripes, but he offered an alibi for the time of the crime before they ever told him when it happened. It’s like this situation we had at work: an employee was accused of going into a single-stall bathroom with a customer. When I interviewed her and told her what she was accused of, she said, “I never even go into the men’s room unless I’m cleaning it.” I’d never told her it was the men’s room she was accused of going into.

“Should we syncopate our watches?” Ahh, Claudia. (By the way, Stacey is wearing a Swatch. Hee hee!)

My random thoughts about the boring Valentine’s Day party? Jake and Laurel show up without Patsy. There’s no age minimum, though, because Ryan DeWitt and Marnie Barrett are both there. (Besides, the BSC usually sets a minimum at five or younger, to prevent Claire Pike tantrums.) Adam Pike made a really gross, bloody card that Stacey assumes must be for one of his brothers. Mathew Hobart asks MA to be his Valentine, despite the fact that all his friends say she’s too old for him.

Stacey winds up going to Alan’s house, and suggesting that he tell whoever took the bag of VGs to bring them back. She was originally very angry with him, but Cary had told Stacey that Alan stole the bag to retrieve both a note he’d written and prank notes that had been written to him. Alan realized a bunch of girls—including the one he’d written to—were writing prank love notes to him and stole the bag to avoid the embarrassment of the girl discovering he liked her. I think just about everyone’s been teased or bullied at some point or another and can relate to Alan’s pain. Stacey, who was ostracized due to her diabetes at her old school, definitely should be able to.

Outfits

Rose Marie: olive green sweater, denim miniskirt

Next: #117

“It feels like you’re in the rain forest.” BSC Mystery #31: Mary Anne and the Music Box Secret (1997)

This book is a whole mess of plotlines all mixed in together, mostly unsuccessfully.

While Granny and Pop-pop* are on a cruise, a flood ruins their basement. The BSC agrees to supervise the cleanup, and Mary Anne finds a parcel labeled “Do not open or you will be cursed.” Inside is a music box that plays Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Hidden in a secret compartment is a letter and a photo of a sailor…a sailor about whom MA had been having dreams since ever since she ripped the paper off the music box, long before she ever found the compartment. At the end of the story, Mary Anne learns that the letter, which was addressed to L.S. and signed H.I.W., was written to Granny by her first love, who died in a war. She kept the box with the letter and his photo in his memory and hid them away now that she was happy with Pop-pop.

Weird things start happening at the house, though, when plumbers start tearing up the yard. Everyone—friends, neighbors, plumbers and contractors—start acting odd. Plus, in pile of old letters Granny wrote her cousin June, she reports all these mysterious goings-on that happened more than fifty years ago in the house where Granny lives now, with a star crossed romance between two teenagers named Lydia and Johnny, and an embezzler. On Sharon’s go-ahead, they dig up the yard and find a box full of documents—but not embezzled money, like everyone expected.

In the B-plot, the Barrett-DeWitt kids build a playhouse in the shed, but it’s too big to fit out the door.

Interesting Tidbits

This is actually the very last BSC book I bought to complete my collection. J

The cover: Late-stage Mary Anne seemed to wear an awful lot of really awful cutoff jean shorts. This is really odd to me, as she’s described as being preppy and these super-short, super-awkward shorts don’t really work with that image for me.

And the book starts with Sharon-itis: Mary Anne finds Sharon’s car keys in the bread box. Richard says they just as easily could have been in the medicine cabinet or Sharon’s underwear drawer.

This book takes place in August, near the end of summer vacation, so it pre-dates #110. My mystery placement is always a little off, but I’m (almost) over it.

Huh. Sharon is planning a surprise anniversary party for Granny and Pop-pop, and Mary Anne says she is really organized when it comes to big projects like that. I guess I can see it. I keep my work schedule organized easily, but often can’t remember where I left my keys either. (Though I never find them in my underwear drawer.)

*It’s always Pop-Pop in the books, not Pop-pop. But I’m lazy and it hurts my fingers to capitalize the second p.

Because Granny and Pop-pop just left on a cruise, MA introduces the BSC members as employees on a cruise ship. (I’m so hearing The Love Boat theme playing. Claudia or Abby would have to be Isaac, giving the double point and wink…) Kristy’s the cruise director and MA, her assistant. The creative director? Claud, natch. Stacey’s the purser, Abby, the athletic director, and Jessi, aerobics instructor. Mal would be in charge of story hour, which I didn’t realize was a cruise ship ‘thing.’

Why is the idea of Granny and Pop-pop playing board games funny? My grandmother likes to play board games sometimes. It’s not as if games are only for children….

When Mary Anne opens the ‘cursed’ package, she jokes that her hair turned white and her fingernails grew long. Actually, to me, the fact that she no longer believes in curses means she’s come a long way since #17, when she wore a necklace simply because she believed she’d be cursed otherwise. That said, she ruins the effect by being a little afraid to open the wooden box she finds inside. I personally would have been far too curious to wait even five minutes before opening it, but I’m well aware that I’m a nosy person.

The plumber, Jim, and contractor, Eddie, working on Granny’s house are also working the Barrett-DeWitt house. Jim makes the following observation after Mary Anne says she knows the seven kids in that household well: “Only seven? I was positive there were at least a dozen.” I imagine that’s true in many large families: the chaos and the noise make it seem like there are more kids than there really are.

The contractor for both the DeWitt house and the Porter (Granny and Pop-Pop) house has a brother named Jake who works with him. I didn’t figure out that Jake was Eddie’s brother at first because Eddie spoke to him when four BSC members were taking thirteen kids on a ‘tour’ of the addition to the DeWitt house. Some of those kids were the Kuhn kids, so when Eddie said, “Right, Jake?” I thought he was talking to Jake Kuhn. It’s actually realistic to have two characters with the same name in one scene, but not normal for the BSC universe.

We don’t have a real mystery yet—just a mystery box—but here are all the people we’ve met so far (AKA suspects): Hank and Esther, Granny and Pop-pop’s friends—Hank used to live in the neighborhood when he was a child, as did Granny; Jim and Dooley, the plumbers; Eddie, Jake, and Lori, the contractors.

Mary Anne and Claudia are with Sharon when the plumbers mention having to dig up the yard. MA notices that Hank gets upset at the idea, and she’s curious if Claudia noticed too. At this point, she hasn’t told her friends about the mystery box yet, so Claudia is way more interested in an impending coffee cake than she is in odd behavior.

Granny and Pop-pop live at 747 Bertrand Drive.

The BSC is really obsessed with the letter, which is to L.S. from H.I.W. They are determined to figure out what those initials stand for, as if that will solve the mysteries.

Claudia spelling: anywon (that’s one of my favorites, right up there with babbysitting), culd, thats, exacly, majore, suspekt, dont.

In Dawn’s Portrait Collection Book, Granny’s name was Rita. In this book, it’s Grace.

Back ‘more than fifty years ago’ when Granny was MA’s age, the home she currently lives in was owned by the Bailey family. (Granny grew up in the house next door.) Lydia Bailey, the teenage daughter, was dating a boy named Johnny Buckman, but her father didn’t approve. The two of them were sneaking around behind her father’s back, and there was a whole thing with him embezzling money from the bank where he worked. Granny caught someone burying something in the yard. MA thinks it’s the music box, but that seems like an odd leap. I agree more with Abby and Kristy, who assume what was being buried was money.

I’m trying to put together a timeline of this neighborhood. Granny grew up in the house next door, and Hank lived on the same block. Granny and Pop-pop ‘moved back’ to Stoneybrook after they got married (from where?) and moved into the house they live in now, which must be where they raised Sharon. Jim the plumber lived across the street until he was nine or so, but Sharon doesn’t recognize him. That means he either moved out of the neighborhood before she was old enough to remember (she’s in her early forties, making him fifty-ish) or he was born after she moved out (making him in his twenties). Either of those could work, until MA says that Jim lived in the neighborhood the same time as the Baileys did.

More Claudia spelling: bleery, cemickals, darkrum**, wuld, wirth, somthing, cant.

**I know more than a few people who would love to drink some darkrum….

The BSC really are terrible actors. They pretend they found a metal box in Granny’s backyard, trying to convince anyone who knows about the alleged buried treasure that they located it. MA says that she’s trying to make her voice sound as loud and enthusiastic as possible, so I’m imagining just how fake that sounded. But it worked! Hank, Jim, and an old man the BSC had seen around the neighborhood, who turned out to be Jim’s dad, all were extremely eager to see what was in the box.

Jessi is really enthusiastic about the Barrett-DeWitt family’s new kids’ bathroom. It’s decorated with ‘jungle-animal’ wall paper. She says the title quote, but to me, that would not be a positive thing…. (Oh, and jungles and rain forests are so not the same thing.)

Here’s my real question regarding the Barrett-DeWitt house. If the parents could afford to build this luxurious addition to the house, why couldn’t they afford a larger house in the first place?

Oh, and since when do people bring potluck food AND presents to housewarming parties? I’d be insulted if I thought I was expected to bring gifts for the whole family and feed myself at a party thrown by family friends. Where I live, it’s vogue for some people to throw themselves housewarming parties and register for gifts, but I find that unbelievably tacky. To me, a gift for a housewarming party is a bottle of wine, not towels and rugs. (It’s even tackier that the Barrett-DeWitts open those gifts in front of the guests, as if it were a birthday party.)

Granny tells MA the truth about the music box after MA finds the ID bracelet the soldier was wearing in the photo among Sharon’s things. Sharon said she got the bracelet from Granny to wear to her prom—and that Granny never explained the stars on it, just told her to always remember her first love (Richard.) Granny then wants Mary Anne to have the music box and the bracelet, now that she has her first love, Logan. It’s about the only part of the story that makes sense to me.

Outfits

Stacey: pink denim overall shorts (after all those mean things she said about Tess’s overalls last week?!), white baby tee, purple Doc Martins, white baseball cap

Claudia: paint-splattered painters pants, tie-dyed t-shirt, red high tops, two braids with purple ribbons

Mary Anne: flowered skirt, blue blouse

Next: #112

“This is a stupid way to die.” BSC Mystery #30: Kristy and the Mystery Train (1997)

This is the second Kristy mystery centered around a Derek Masters plotline. Were there any justice in the BSC-universe, those both should have been Jessi plots.

Derek’s back in town, and he’s taking a train trip as publicity for his new mystery movie. Kristy, Abby and Stacey go along for the ride, along with Nicky, David Michael, Linny, James and Buddy. Weird things go on during the ride, odd notes show up everywhere, and then Stacey and Kristy see a man pushed overboard (over rail?) Turns out that the screenwriter stole the script from a student of his, who wanted credit. He’d faked his own death and then tried to kidnap the screenwriter’s son before the BSC and a couple of adults subdue him.

The pool at the country club from mystery #23 opens for the summer, and Stephen Stanton-Cha is acting oddly. Eventually, the sitters find out he doesn’t know how to swim. Jessi helps him feel more comfortable in the water and he has a good time after that.

Interesting Tidbits

The cover is completely hideous. I think the mystery of the train is how horrible Kristy and Abby look here…

Kristy introduces Karen as her stepfather’s daughter, which is kind of an odd way of putting it. I mean, it’s technically true, but sort of roundabout. It’s almost as if I identified my mother as my father’s ex-wife.

The Masterses drive a Mercedes station wagon.

Stacey points out that Mal would like to see Louisa May Alcott’s house, but given that that is Mary Anne’s favorite book, wouldn’t see be just as interested?

Elizabeth and Watson are way too nice. After the Masterses agree to take a total of nine kids* on the train trip, the Brewers take the five Stoneybrook kids and the three sitters up to Boston for the night. The kids are all ramped up, so they have to get them a seafood dinner**, three hotel rooms, and all the expenses related to a day-long walking tour of the building.

*Derek, Todd, DM, Buddy, James, Linny, Nicky, Derek’s friend Greg and Todd’s friend Daniel

**I thought Abby was allergic to seafood? I’m going to need to review her allergies here sometime soon.

I can’t explain why, but every time I try to write Buddy Barrett’s name, I type Butty. And then, because I’m so juvenile, I giggle a little bit.

“I woke up early the next morning to…Abby breath.” This also made me giggle.

Oh, here Stacey goes again. She calls Boston a ‘little’ town because it’s smaller than NYC. If Logan’s superpower is superdickery, Stacey’s is supersnobbery.

People we meet on the train (aka suspects): Rock Harding (love that Hollywood name), the director; Ronald Pierce, screenwriter (and Daniel’s father); Anne Arbour, publicist (named after a city, hee hee); Jane Atlantic, reporter (Kristy keeps pointing out how much she looks like Stacey, so you know that’s going to be important); Benjamin Athens (People’s sexiest man on the planet) and Elle San Carlos, leads in the movie; Charlie, Elle’s husband/ex-husband

I loooove the idea that Benjamin and Elle are having an affair for publicity, yet we’re given the impression that Elle and her hubby aren’t quite divorced yet. It’s all insinuation so far, but it’s a lot more adult than you see in most of these books.

Nicky actually asks if everyone who lives in California is a vegetarian, and Greg (who is Californian and vegetarian, hence the question) says no. But the BSC books tend to give the opposite conclusion.

I like this: Kristy decides to keep an eye on Nicky and Greg, because they’re Derek’s two best friends, meeting for the first time. She equates it to when she got to know Dawn. I also related it to SS#8, when Linny and Nicky—DM’s two best friends—fought all the time. Obviously, they got over it, as they’re both on this trip and getting along.

You have to wonder who’s in charge of this train trip and whether they should be fired. I mean, a bunch of tomfoolery occurs and slips of paper saying ‘The truth will come out’ are everywhere, yet no one seems to be doing too much to stop it. Derek suggests that a rubber severed hand served as a lunch entrée was a publicity stunt. Kristy disagrees because Anne, the publicist, seems horrified by it all. Cynical adult me wonders whether Anne’s worried for the movies stars or whether she’s worried about losing her job…

The BSC members who aren’t on the mystery train show up for the first day of the country club to help man it. Mary Anne shows up looking like she stole her dad’s old clothes, which kind of makes me laugh. And Jessi’s wearing ‘reef runners.’ I had to Google that to see what they were.

Oh, and Claudia is teasing Mallory about her hat and cover-up and high powered SPF sunscreen. Mal does seem like the kind of person who would burn very easily in the sun—reddish hair, fair skin—but we all know it’s usually Mary Anne who has to cover up like that. (Mal says she’s worried about getting more freckles, though.)

Leave it to Karen to make sure everyone is following the pool rules. I have to admit, I was that kind of kid too, but I was never outspoken enough to boss my friends around.

The title quote is Kristy’s thoughts when their train car fills with smoke and they can’t get the door open. (It’s just a smoke bomb, but everyone’s majorly tense afterward…until Linny’s grateful it wasn’t a stink bomb and all the boys start laughing.)

I think the only reason Stacey is in on this mystery is because she’s up on Hollywood gossip in a way most of the BSC wouldn’t be.

Grr. Daniel, Todd’s little friend, is described as being stocky in passing when he first appears in the story. The first time Daniel actually gets to talk, he’s mad at his father because Mr. Pierce said Daniel couldn’t have any more ice cream. It’s more subtle than the BSC always mentioning how fat Norman is, but I still don’t like it. Later, when Daniel is upset after he witnesses someone allegedly going over the side of the train, his dad buys him by…getting him more ice cream.

“Next time you decide to witness a murder, could you wait until I’m around?” –Guess who

This is kind of weird. As I mentioned earlier, Mal, Jessi, Claudia and Mary Anne are supervising the kids at the opening of the country club pool. One of the kids hanging around the pool, waiting for it to reopen after lunch, is Ben Hobart. He keeps making jokes about barfing and teasing the kids. I’m wondering if the ghostwriter got the Hobart boys confused. James, the same age as many of the kids who were at the pool—Karen and friends, Charlotte, Becca, Jackie, Luke, etc—was with Derek on the train. Maybe they’ve confused Mathew, who would also fit into this age range, with Ben? Otherwise, there’s a good reason that Mal and Ben never got their pseudo-relationship off the ground.

Okay, I have a favorite scene in this book, for a very odd reason. Mal is putting on more sunscreen—SPF 60 this time, and waterproof. Karen becomes concerned that if the sunscreen is really waterproof, it will never come off and Mallory would be stuck with sunscreen on her forever! Normally, this would turn into Karen going off on a tangent and being obnoxious. When she starts, Mal shuts her down by pointing off that it will wash off with soap, so Karen’s story is moot. She then won’t let her keep talking about it. I now love Mallory.

Abby tells Kristy there’s an ocean of mystery about Jane Atlantic, and even Kristy thinks it’s her worst pun yet. Oh, and Abby thinks that Anne Arbour’s name is a horrible pun as well.

Why in the hell would the babysitters tell the kids—mostly eight year olds—about the alleged murder they witnessed? That’s horribly irresponsible.

You know someone’s got a lot of clothing on the train when even Stacey says that it’s too much clothing.

Why does everyone on this train leave their compartment unlocked? The babysitters take the seven older boys to do some illegal searches, and every sleeper compartment they go into is open, and no one is inside them.

Claudia spelling. Praty (party…she spells it right 4 out of 5 times), anemals.

At the pool party, there is a silly bathing cap contest, and earlier, Mallory notes that Jenny is wearing one. The only time I ever wore a swim cap when I was growing up was when I went to Girl Scout camp and had to wear one. I would have never worn one when swimming for fun.

Kristy thinks she’d like to be a movie director someday…because it would give her a lot of people to boss around.

I only have five more mysteries left to read: two Mary Annes, a Stacey, an Abby and a Kristy. As flat-out awful as some of these books have been, I’m sort of sad about that. (If I keep up this pace, I’ll be done with this blog by the end of the year. Expect a lot more awwwwww! Ultra-mega-sad-face moments out of me…)

Outfits

Stacey: ‘butter-colored’ linen shirt, chino shorts, cork-sole sandals

Claudia: red shorts, purple crop top, red and white muscle shirt, purple socks, red high tops, apple earrings; tie-dyed t-shirt knotted at the waist, flower sandals and barrette

Jessi: pink leotard, jeans; blue bike shorts and sports bra, red t-shirt, reef runners

Mallory: long sleeved shirt, shorts, sneakers, hat

Mary Anne: green Izod shirt, baseball cap with ‘Ted’s Tools’ on it

Next: #110